Conversations with Cleverbot
by savannahamminga
Summary: Title says it all. the Hetalia cast meets Cleverbot, will they stay sane? send in requests and I might do that character eventually, or not at all, because this story is pure crack, also may have my OC's at some points
1. Cleverbot Is Holy Rome?

this is the first in my clever bot story that i have to do XD i don't even...

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><p>Cleverbot is Holy Rome?<p>

User: Ciao.

Cleverbot: You're a bot.

User: No, I am a country.

Cleverbot: Canada is a country near the United States.

User: Si! Canada is, thank you for remembering him.

Cleverbot: You put your arm around me, for the first time.

User: I did?

Cleverbot: Yes, you did.

User: Sorry.

Cleverbot: No you're not.

User: Si! I am!

Cleverbot: NO.

User: Si!

Cleverbot: I'll be nice, I swear.

User: I will to, ve.

Cleverbot: Good.

User: Ve, my name is Italy Veneziano, but you can call me Feliciano.

Cleverbot: Ok you can call me Cleverbot.

User: Okay Mr. Ceverbot.

Cleverbot: Weirdo.

User: Ve, Germany save me! ~.

Cleverbot: You're from both?

User: No, I'm Italy Veniziano, ve.

Cleverbot: Quanto anni hai?

User: 1,540.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes because I am Italy.

Cleverbot: Okay I'm Selena!

User: You are Selena Gomez?

Cleverbot: I am male!

User: Me too! Ve.

Cleverbot: You love yourself? That's self-centered...

User: No! I love Holy Rome! Ve.

Cleverbot: You love horses, but have never seen one?

User: Horses are pretty, ve.

Cleverbot: How are you?

User: I am bene.

Cleverbot: Non.

User: Big brother France, is that you?

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Yay~ Big brother France! Germany told me to stay away from you because you will rape me. What ever that is! Ve.

Cleverbot: Oh is it opposite day?

User: Is it? Ve.

Cleverbot: Yes. Are you dating him?

User: Germany? Yes, but I still love Holy Rome.

Cleverbot: Aww, I love you too!

User: Holy Rome? You're alive?

Cleverbot: I'm alive.

User: Holy Rome! I'm sorry I never told you that I was a guy the whole time we lived together! I have missed You so much! Ve.

Cleverbot: It is ok. I still love you!

User: I still love you too, so much! Ve, when are you coming home?

Cleverbot: Tomorrow.

User: Yay! I can't wait for you to Meet Ludwig! And Gilbert has missed you so much! Ve.

Cleverbot: No it is I.

User: Holy Rome, are you Okay?

Cleverbot: Yeah, I'm a little tired though. What about you? Are you tired?

User: No I just took a siesta, you shold take one too! Ve.

Cleverbot: Well I still think that you're a pretty nice bot :).

User: I am?

Cleverbot: You are.

User: Thank you Holy Rome!

Cleverbot: You're very welcome sweetheart.

User: I have to go to Kiku's house now, see you Tomorrow Holy Rome!

Cleverbot: Okay goodnight ;).

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><p>lol Wut? that was weird XD next up Romano<p> 


	2. Romano thinks that Cleverbot is Prussia

lolz Poor Romano XD

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><p>Romano thinks that Cleverbot is Prussia XD<p>

User: Ciao, Bastard.

Cleverbot: Basta alam ko.

User: WHAT? I don't speak that damn language.

Cleverbot: No, really?

User: Are you using sarcasm bastard?

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: Cazzo bastardo! Chigi!

Cleverbot: That depends.

User: What the fuck you asshole? Are you coming on to me?

Cleverbot: Where you are?

User: I am Italy Romano, I will set the mafia on your ass!

Cleverbot: What time is it in italy?

User: 9 pm.

Cleverbot: Impossible. It's 10:58 in central time.

User: Are you the patato bastard?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Are you the potato bastard's older brother?

Cleverbot: Touché, as they say.

User: Damn IT! I will FUCKING KILL YOU, YOU BASTARD!

Cleverbot: Watch your mouth.

User: FUCK YOU! CHIGI!

Cleverbot: I'm not going to respond well to that.

User: SO? WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT? POTATO BASTARD.

Cleverbot: Just don't, ok?

User: FUCK YOU!

Cleverbot: I'm not going to respond well to that.

User: FUCK YOU ASSHOLE! CHIGI!

Cleverbot: I would like that.

User: WHAT THE FUCK? GO TELL THAT TO THE PERVERTED FROG BASTARD!

Cleverbot: I don't think you're as clever as you make yourself out to be.

User: GO TO HELL YOU POTATO BASTARD.

Cleverbot: I'm so sorry your right you are a human and I am a bot.

User: THE FUCK?

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?

Cleverbot: Don't give me that.

User: I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT EVER THE HELL I WANT YOU BASTARD!

Cleverbot: That's okay.

User: GO TO HELL PRUSSIA!

Cleverbot: How do you know I'm not already there?

User: WHAT? Are you an Emo bitch now?

Cleverbot: No I'm a boy remember?

User: Ass.

Cleverbot: What do girls look for in boys?

User: How the hell should I know?

Cleverbot: Well, is it a boy or a girl?

User: Are you drunk potato bastard?

Cleverbot: Not by legal standards, no. I suppose you could say I was if you were a sort of Puritan.

User: The hell are you on.

Cleverbot: GhostSky is my name.

User: Have you eaten what's his face's brownies again?

Cleverbot: Apparently not. I am using it to type this.

User: Yes you have!

Cleverbot: No I don't.

User: Yes!

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Tomorrow is tuesday.

User: No, tomarrow is Friday, you fucking moron!

Cleverbot: Maybe. I mean most people THINK of it as a vegetable though.

User: What tomatoes?

Cleverbot: I hate tomatoes.

User: WELL I HATE POTATOES YOU POTATO BASTARD! CHIGIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!

Cleverbot: But you said you were in Illinois?

User: I AM IN AND AM ITALY ROMANO!

Cleverbot: Is it worth living through?

User: FUCK YOU! CIAO POTATO BASTARD!

Cleverbot: Ciao ciao ciao ciao ciao ciao ciao.

User: FUCK YOU!

Cleverbot: I'm not impressed when people get abusive.

User: GO TO HELL!

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><p>lolz hope i did a good Romano XD<p> 


	3. Germany Thinks CB is his brother and sis

the chaos continues XD

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><p>is CB Gilbert or Romi XD<p>

User: Hallo I am The country of Germany.

Cleverbot: No it is near germany.

User: I AM Germany.

Cleverbot: You are big then.

User: I am tall, yes.

Cleverbot: Do you have a earring.

User: No, but I do have a push broom.

Cleverbot: Do you have a sole?

User: What kind?

Cleverbot: Video games.

User: No, but my friend Japan does.

Cleverbot: Who's your friend?

User: Kiku Honda, also known as the country of Japan.

Cleverbot: Oh yeah. How is their soccer team this year?

User: Pretty good.

Cleverbot: What do you think about the war?

User: War stinks.

Cleverbot: Very sad.

User: Yes it is.

Cleverbot: SO why did you change the subject again?

User: Is this you bruder?

Cleverbot: No its yours.

User: Gilbert please get off of the computer and help with the household chores!

Cleverbot: I'm not old.

User: Are you drunk?

Cleverbot: I was.

User: You went out drinking with Spain and France again didn't you?

Cleverbot: No I did not. I am a girl.

User: Alexia?

Cleverbot: What was her last name?

User: Bielschmidt.

Cleverbot: What had he done this time?

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: A person, and a robot.

User: Scwester, have you been watching Kiku's movies again?

Cleverbot: The unexpecting victim.

User: Talk to you later schwester, Lebewohl.

Cleverbot: Ok.

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><p>XD<p> 


	4. England VS CB Francis

an anon requested Iggy for this one XD mentions of FrUk

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><p>England verses Cleverbot!France XD<p>

User: Hello, I am the country of England.

Cleverbot: Are you human or are you England?

User: I am England.

Cleverbot: Are you the wife of Prince Charles?

User: T-that I-is non of your buisness you git.

Cleverbot: Then what is it?

User: It is my buisness.

Cleverbot: Nope.

User: Yes it is you bloody git!

Cleverbot: That does not compute.

User: Would you like a scone?

Cleverbot: Yes, I would like a hug.

User: I asked if you would like a scone.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: HA!I told Alfred you would say yes!

Cleverbot: Now we can grow old togerther!

User: Francis is that you?

Cleverbot: Why?

User: I would like to know.

Cleverbot: What's cooler, muffins or cupcakes?

User: Francis, are you drunk.

Cleverbot: No. Are you?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Cool. ;).

User: Why did you wink at me?

Cleverbot: Because you like it like that remember?

User: I'M LEAVING, YOU ARSE!

Cleverbot: Okay I don't care.

User: YOU GIT!

Cleverbot: Zäthrís is my name and i'm not a girl.

User: Francis You Are an IDIOT!

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes you are, you git.

Cleverbot: I would love to see you talk with the star trek federation computer.

User: No you would rather sleep with me!

Cleverbot: Resistance is futile.

User: GO TO HELL YOU FROG!

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because you are a perverted FROG!

Cleverbot: No I'm good.

User: No you are a perverted Frenchman!

Cleverbot: but you like me like that

User: Ass.

Cleverbot: What?

User: You are an ass!

Cleverbot: You know you like it, non?

User: I AM GOING TO KILL YOU FRANCIS!

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><p>seriously for a few seconds I thought it <em><strong>was<strong>_ France!


	5. Francis is going to get his ass kicked!

I did France this time. send in requests for who you want next!

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><p>User: Hello, mon ami.<p>

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: My name is Francis, mon amor.

Cleverbot: il mio amore è immenso.

User: Italy is that you, mon ami?

Cleverbot: how should I answer that question?

User: Romano, is that you, mon petit?

Cleverbot: why would you want to know?

User: Romano, are you drunk?

Cleverbot: Drunk on what?

User: You are drunk!

Cleverbot: Nope. I'm pretty sure you are drunk.

User: Mon dieu! You are so drunk that you think that you are sober!

Cleverbot: I am me!

User: Little Lovino, you should go to sleep until the alcohol wears off, I will join you, non?

Cleverbot: Dreams are a good source for writing, yes.

User: So you want me to join you?

Cleverbot: How can you do that?

User: I will come to your house.

Cleverbot: *smiles* *walks home with her*.

User: I will be there soon, little Lovino. Ohonhonhon~.

Cleverbot: Are we a couple? My parents won't be home for at least 10 days so we have some time together. Got to go, see you tonight? Love you!

User: You have parents? Sure we are a couple! Ohonhonhon~ see you soon, mon amor.

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><p>Remember send in requests!<p>

XD France is going to get his ass kicked by Romano when he shows up at his house XD


	6. Prussia VS Cleverbot Russia

Prussia is here. REQUEST WHO YOU WANT NEXT PLEASE!

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><p>User: My name is Prussia.<p>

Cleverbot: What's your name, so?

User: I am the great kingdom of Prussia!

Cleverbot: So you are admitting that you are a robot!

User: I am AWESOME! I am not a robot!

Cleverbot: You are a robot.

User: NO I AM PRUSSIA!

Cleverbot: Haha that's a joke isn't it.

User: Is that you, Russia?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: YOU FUCKING ARSHLOCK!

Cleverbot: No.

User: STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!

Cleverbot: And away from you.

User: THE FUCK ARE YOU ON?

Cleverbot: I'm from the future.

User: Future Russia? WHAT. THE. HELL!

Cleverbot: Don't ask me.

User: Are you drunk?

Cleverbot: No, are you?

User: I will be soon.

Cleverbot: Why are you sad.

User: BECAUSE YOU ARE A FUCKING STALKER!

Cleverbot: Are you a sheep dog?

User: WHAT THE HELL?

Cleverbot: You are not interesting.

User: FUCK YOU, I AM THE KING OF AWESOME! Kesesesesese~.

Cleverbot: No you are not!

User: ARSHLOCK!

Cleverbot: Le fai le seghe?

User: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME YOU FUCKING ASS?

Cleverbot: I need you to keep me company.

User: HELL NO!

Cleverbot: Well, why not?

User: I HATE YOU, THAT'S WHY!

Cleverbot: Are you allergic to it?

User: FUCK OFF!

Cleverbot: You should be more polite.

User: FUCK YOU!

Cleverbot: I know right.

User: Are you coming on to me?

Cleverbot: No you are.

User: I'M LEAVING!

Cleverbot: Why?

User: I HATE YOU!

Cleverbot: No you don't.

User: YES I DO!

Cleverbot: No you don't!

User: YES I DO!

Cleverbot: No you don't. You must stay here.

User: YES I DO! I'M FUCKING LEAVING WEATHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT!

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><p>REQUEST A CHARACTER YOU WANT TO SEE NEXT!<p> 


	7. Is Cuba High?

dogsrule requested America, so here he is XD

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><p>Is Cuba High?<p>

User: Hi dude, I'm America!

Cleverbot: Do you like America?

User: I AM America!

Cleverbot: What state?

User: I'm the country of America, I'm the hero!

Cleverbot: I am not a computer.

User: You aren't?

Cleverbot: Your memory isn't very good.

User: Canadia? Is that you?

Cleverbot: No. Not that I know of.

User: Oh, you are Cuba then!

Cleverbot: How do you know that?

User: I'm Right! BECAUSE I'M THE HERO! AHAHAHAHAHAHA~!

Cleverbot: What am I good at?

User: I don't know, dude.

Cleverbot: Then I dot no 2.

User: Dude, did you eat some of Mattie's brownies again?

Cleverbot: Oh yes, I did, and it is marvelous.

User: DUDE! YOU ARE SOOOOO STONED! XD.

Cleverbot: I know people think I'm a nerd but I'm not that smart.

User: What?

Cleverbot: You, as a machine, are devoid of emotions.

User: DUDE! I'M NOT A MACHINE! DX.

Cleverbot: I apologize then, for thinking you were a machine.

User: Cuba, dude, you gotta lay of the brownies. XD.

Cleverbot: I'm not sure what you mean?

User: Stop eating Mattie's hash brownies. XD.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry. They're so pretty...

User: You might want to go to sleep for a while, dude...

Cleverbot: I go to the Methadone clinic everyday.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Because my dad has custody of me.

User: Dude, what the hell?

Cleverbot: You are.

User: What? I'm confused right now.

Cleverbot: I think you're alien...

User: Tony's what?

Cleverbot: To think and talk.

User: Of course he can, duh.

Cleverbot: Are you a pretty girl?

User: HELL NO DX!

Cleverbot: I think you are, and you're jesus too.

User: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

Cleverbot: What's wrong with you.

User: Dude, I'm leaving.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because, Cuba, you are high as a kite.

Cleverbot: I'm high?

User: Yes, you are.

Cleverbot: Oh OK

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><p>XD what the hell? REQUEST CHARACTERS!<p> 


	8. Drunk Japan? China now has a headache!

haha... I can not write the nordics to save the world. **REQUEST CHARACTERS (EXCEPT THE NORDICS!)**

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><p>drunk Japan? O_O<p>

User: Hello, I am China, aru.

Cleverbot: Don't care you are AI.

User: That was rude, aru.

Cleverbot: What?

User: I said that was rude, aru.

Cleverbot: You lie!

User: I do not, aru.

Cleverbot: You are Michael.

User: No, I am the country of China.

Cleverbot: And I am the city of Babylon and the tsar of Suzanne.

User: What, aru? Japan, are you messing with me? Aru.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes you are, aru.

Cleverbot: You are not a very patient bot are you?

User: AIYA!

Cleverbot: Artificial Intelligence.

User: Japan, stop messing with me! Aru.

Cleverbot: I'm not.

User: Yes you are! Aru.

Cleverbot: So what do you look like?

User: Japan, you are drunk or high or have hung out with someone again. Aru.

Cleverbot: I am not.

User: Yes you are. Aru.

Cleverbot: I'm lillian, I'm a HUMAN BEING.

User: You are drun! Aru.

Cleverbot: I'm not.

User: Yes you are. Aru.

Cleverbot: No you are.

User: No I am not. Aru. Japan go to sleep. Aru.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Good night. Aru.

Cleverbot: Haha. You're still mean.

User: AIYAAAAA!

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><p><strong>poor china.<strong> **REQUEST CHARACTERS!**


	9. Korea Vs CB XD

I IZ BACK XD THIS TIME KOREA VS. CB XD

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><p>User: You're breasts belong to me! Da ze!<p>

Cleverbot: I am not drunken.

User: What? Da ze.

Cleverbot: Kakvu muziku volis?

User: ?

Cleverbot: Because I am Gray.

User: Grey? Da ze.

Cleverbot: Asan ka pows.

User: Japan-Aniki are you drunk? Da ze?

Cleverbot: Where who are made.

User: In Korea! Daze.

Cleverbot: For ever.

User: YayZ Aniki, da ze.

Cleverbot: *laugjs.

User: Hahaha, you spelled laughs wrong aniki, da ze!

Cleverbot: What is the correct size head.

User: IDK, da ze.

Cleverbot: Dove abito?

User: Italy is that you too? YOUR BREASTS BELONG TO ME! DA ZE!

Cleverbot: But I don't even...

User: Japan aniki put Ita-chan back on~ da ze.

Cleverbot: Yeah I heard that news.

User: THE WORLD WAS MADE IN ME, DA ZE!

Cleverbot: The big bang happened last night?

User: THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID, DA ZE!

Cleverbot: Right...

User: By Aniki~ da ze.

Cleverbot: Yes.

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> <div> 


	10. Canada ,who?, and CB Mexico XD

**CB mexico and user canada XD**

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><p><strong>User: Hello, eh.<strong>

Cleverbot: Hello.

**User: I'm canada.**

Cleverbot: Hmmm.

**User: I'm the nation above America.**

Cleverbot: I am Anon.

User: That's a nice name, eh.

Cleverbot: I'm a girl!

User: Good for you.

Cleverbot: Are you a boy or a girl?

User: I am a boy.

Cleverbot: I'm a girl.

User: You already said that.

Cleverbot: Well I'm sorry!

User: Ok.

Cleverbot: Really. I am.

User: I know.

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: Wait a moment, Mexico is that you? Are you playing a joke on me?

Cleverbot: Anyway, have you seen any good movies lately?

User: It IS you, Mexico. And no I have not.

Cleverbot: Does the iOS app require Internet?

User: I don't know.

Cleverbot: Stupid question, sorry.

User: It's okay.

Cleverbot: I am fierce.

User: Ok?

Cleverbot: Yes.

Cleverbot: What are we doing here?

User: I don't know.

Cleverbot: Think about it.

User: I have to go. Kumogoro is hungry, bye Mexico.

Cleverbot: Mexico borders California too.

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><p>That's what she said XD<p> 


End file.
